Yes it’s true. I am without a Christmas tree for the fourth year in a row. When Alex was alive she was such a good girl I could put up a tree, and even hang tinsel on it; she wouldn’t touch it if I told her no. Finnegan and Lacey are a whole other ball game. Long drapes – check! Climbs them. Loose TV or computer wires – check! Plays with them. Toilet paper – check! Plays with it and eats it. Finney even got constipated once after eating it, I had to take him to the vet. I have to keep the toilet paper in an enclosed trash can next to the toilet.
Most of the time I don’t mind too much that it’s not really my house or my things anymore. Because as every cat owner knows; we don’t own them, they own us. So it stands to reason that they also own everything in the house. Especially since they fully believe they do anyway. Christmas is the one time I wish I could have what I want for a change. I’d love to put up even my small, artificial tree, have some lights, pretty decorations, glittery garland, etc. But I can see it now. All day and all night I’d be fighting the inevitable; the chewing on the wires (absolutely too dangerous), the eating of the tinsel (also dangerous), the batting around and breaking of the ornaments, and so on.
In my mind I can see the tree being knocked over several times a day. I can see them ever so cleverly pretend they don’t care about it anymore only to wait until I’m sleeping or not home for the real fun to start. I can see my tree-top angel being mangled to bits and feathers flung, half eaten, all over the floor. I do manage to put up some decorations as long as they’re completely out of reach (which is not easy with cats). Even then it’s unbelievably compelling and they spend a good amount of time staring and thinking of ways to get at them. I also have some ceramic decorations but those also have to be kept out of reach in fear of Lacey’s paw of doom! You know that paw; the one that acts like they are just inspecting the object only to take a sudden swipe at it and before you know it…CRASH! I suppose I could put up a fiber optic tree but that still would not allow me to hang my ornaments and pretty decorations. And it goes without saying that there is absolutely no way I could ever leave presents out. That would be a complete waste of wrapping paper. For now (and maybe forever) that tree will have to stay in the basement all by itself, as if it’s the Charlie Brown Christmas tree; so lonely. Bah…humbug. And I will remain always and forever…tree-less.